For the first time in a long time I can say that I am truly happy. A lot of that comes from being happy with myself. Maybe this is why I love to travel so much, but when I am in the states I always feel judged by everyone. It flares an insecurity in me that hinders any true happiness that I could have. People are so obsessed with appearance in the states they fail to enjoy all life has to offer. But when I am abroad I never feel that sort of judgement from anyone... even other American travelers. It is mystifying how I could feel judged by someone in the states and not when I am abroad.
It seems as though no one here cares... everyone is just wanting to have a good time. And I love it. For the first time... in my life maybe... I have been walking around in a bathing suit with out an insecure thought ever crossing my mind, without a care in the world... and this is a feeling that is completely new to me. To think that skinny people feel this all the time makes me that much more envious of them. :)
Not only am I happy with myself, but I love the adventure of my life. Living in a different country, learning a new language, traveling to new places, meeting other travelers... everyday is a new experience. And I love my job. I make crap money, but I enjoy what I am doing. I get to be creative without limitations. I am given free reign on all my projects and I am getting to learn new programs and quickly improving my skills.
All in all... life is good and I am enjoying every minute of it.
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