Sometimes I wish I was a Badass

I'm sure I am not alone in this wish.  There is something universally appealing about being a badass.  Maybe it is the unwavering respect from... well everyone.  Or the feeling of dominance and power...  of being completely confident in any and every situation, knowing that there is nothing and no one that can thwart you.  Haven't you ever wanted to walk into a room and have everyone be somewhat intimidated by your mere presence?  Or the ability to stop a fight just by showing up because you are the ultimate badass.  

And this could also just be an instance of me wanting what I can't have.  Considering my birthplace, background and upbringing... it is a guaranteed impossibility that I would have ever ended up as a badass.  But a girl can dream...

Empathy

I think if I were born into a supernatural world... I would have been an empath. One who could feel the emotions of the people around them. I am oddly tuned into the emotions and feelings of others and I not only know what they are feeling, but put myself in their situation and actually feel what they are feeling.

I am known by all as the emotional television watcher... I cry at anything. But to explain why I am so emotional in television programs, I need you to understand that I am not only sympathizing with the characters like most emotional viewers.. I am empathsizing with them. For example, and this is quite embarrassing, but when I am watching TV and something emotional happens to the characters... like they get their heart broken... I honestly feel like someone just broke my heart and then the tears come. I absolutely have no control over it, I can hold back a bit around others (when I am alone it is all over) but basically the crying is involuntary.

Another example, if a character breaks his or her arm and is screaming in pain... my arm will start to tingle. It is truly bizarre! A character could lose a loved one.. and in turn I feel like my loved one just died. I mean really, what IS that?!?! It happens in real life as well... not just by watching television. I feel what those around me are feeling. It is like woman intuition and sympathy multipied on steriods!

So again I would like to state, that had I been born into a world of magic and supernatural powers... this would have been mine: the power of empathy.

Tickling is not fun... its torture

Ok people... it is time to get this one thing straight, because I fear most of the world is severely mistaken.  Tickling is NOT fun... it's pure torture in one of its worst forms.  Do not take this lightly because it is not a joke.  For those of you out there that bear the burden of being as ticklish as I am, you know what I'm talking about.  The unfortunate result of being tickled is laughter, and here lies the foundation of your confusion.  The tickler... or torturer if you will, sees the victims uncontrollable laughter and thinks he/she is having fun or God forbids... enjoys it.  This assumption would of course fall under every other instance of laughter and can understandably be confusing to those who have never felt the wrath of being tickled.  But I say here, now, take this with you for the rest of your life... tickling is the one exception to the rule of laughter.  Do not be fooled by this cruel distraction, outside you might see all smiles and joy, but inside we are slowly dying, suffocating, writhing with pain.... and can do naught but wait for the torturer to end this misery... unable to defend ourselves.  So I ask you, nay I plead you... next time you intend to tickle someone... ask yourself these two simple questions; 1) is this person a friend or an enemy... and 2) do they deserve the impending torture I plan to inflict on them?

Nicholas Sparks

So I've decided that Nicholas Sparks hates love.  He writes these epic love stories and then kills off one of the characters.  I want to know what girl F-ed him over cause it must have been bad!  Its like he dreams up the fairy tale love just to end it tragically.  

I recently went to see Nights in Rodanthe.  Great, great movie... another great love story that ends in tears.  Funny thing is I use to watch these kind of movies and dream about having that kind of love.  It made me hopeful and feel good.  However lately when I watch love stories all I think is am I ever going to have that.  I am completely hopeless.  It's amazing how one experience in your life can effect you so much.  Change the way you look at life, change the way you look at people.  

Should expectations have limits when it comes to love?

Lately I have been wondering whether my expectations for love are too high.  I have always dreamed of "fairy tale" love.  Maybe that is my answer, that the kind of love I'm looking for is labeled as fairy tale love.  When is it settling and when are you being unrealistic?  

I am constantly being told by my friends to give guys a chance.  I seem to get this instant feeling of whether I am into a guy or not, or if this is a guy for me and for the last 4 years I haven't had that feeling.  Maybe I am making up my mind too soon, maybe I should wait a little longer before I write them off.  

What if you wait your whole life for something that never comes?  What if what you want isn't realistic?  Or what if it is, what if there is this great fairy tale love out there and you just aren't patient enough?

Should I listen to everyone else and just date around until I'm comfortable enough to spend the rest of my life with that person, or wait?  I seem to be the only one still in fairy tale mode... you know when your young, you and all of your girlfriends have the same "romeo-juliet-princess-prince-live-happily-ever-after" view of love.  Then as you get older the numbers dwindle down and it seems now at twenty-three, I am the only one left standing.  

When is it time to stop dreaming and grow up?

Action above words

So I recently watched and read "The Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch. He was a professor who was diagnosed with cancer and given 3-6 months to live. He gave a "last lecture", traditionally done by professors who are retiring, however Randy's case was special, it really would be his last lecture. He gave some incredible advice about really living your life and following your childhood dreams. I recommend that everybody should at the very least watch the lecture online.

Anyways, one chapter was about advice he heard from a female co-worker which he said was "pound for pound the best advice he ever heard". His co-worker told him "it took awhile but I finally figured it out. When it comes to men who are romantically interested in you, completely ignore everything he says and only pay attention to what he does"

I love it!! I bet that every girl can look back on her relationships and at one time or another been hypnitised by what a guy was telling her. I don't know what it is about some guys, but they know exactly what to say to charm you. They know exactly what you want to hear. But these words mean nothing if they are not mirrored in the guys actions.

It's like that quote from the movie Brown Sugar. The main character is using Rap and Hip Hop as a metaphor for her feelings for two different guys. "Rap and Hip Hop are two different things. It's like the difference between saying 'I love you' and actually being in love. Rap is just a word."

Anybody can say "I love you". The trick is weeding out the liars.... and so I say again... to all women out there... don't listen to anything your man says until you have paid attention to his actions. And there in his actions is the truth.... and the truth will set you free.

This is me

I took the Myers-Briggs personality test to find out that I am an ENFP... after reading the description of ENFP personalities I was amazed.  Did Myers and Briggs know me?  I initially took the test in the book Do What You Are by Paul Tieger and Barbara Barron, a career book that takes the personalities from the Myers-Briggs test to match you with careers (great book! I would recommend it to anyone).  Anyways this is me...

The Inspirer....

ENFPs are full of enthusiasm and new ideas.  Optimistic, spontaneous, creative, and confident, they have original minds and a strong sense of the possible.  Because they are so interested in possibilities, ENFPs see significance in all things and prefer to keep lots of options open.  They are perceptive and keen observers who notice anything out of the ordinary.  ENFPs are curious, and prefer to understand rather than judge.  They live in the world of possibilities, and can become very passionate and excited about things.  Their enthusiasm lend them the ability to inspire and motivate others.  They can talk their way in or out of anything.  They love life, seeing it as a special gift, and strive to make the most of it.

ENFPs have an unusually broad range of skills and talents. They are good at most things which interest them. Project-oriented, they may go through several different careers during their lifetime. To onlookers, the ENFP may seem directionless and without purpose, but ENFPs are actually quite consistent, in that they have a strong sense of values which they live with throughout their lives. Everything that they do must be in line with their values. An ENFP needs to feel that they are living their lives as their true Self, walking in step with what they believe is right. They see meaning in everything, and are on a continuous quest to adapt their lives and values to achieve inner peace. They're constantly aware and somewhat fearful of losing touch with themselves. Since emotional excitement is usually an important part of the ENFP's life, and because they are focused on keeping "centered", the ENFP is usually an intense individual, with highly evolved values.

Imaginative, adaptable and alert, ENFPs value inspiration above all else and are often ingenious inventors.  They are good at seeing new ways to do things.  They have lots of initiative and find problems stimulating.  ENFPs are charming and full of vitality.  They treat people with sympathy, gentleness, and warmth and are ready to help anyone with a problem.  They can be remarkably insightful and perceptive, and they often care about the development of others.  They put more energy into maintaining personal relationships than into maintaining objects, and they like to keep a wide assortment of relationships alive.

Since they find it so easy to generate ideas, they have difficulty focusing on just one thing at a time and can have trouble making decisions.  They see so many possibilities that they have difficulty selecting the best activity or interest to pursue.  ENFPs are not particularly well organized.